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I Don't Wanna (Love U) (Radio Edit)

by Begonia

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about

A few years ago Matt Schellenberg sent me this sample idea he had been working on and we sat down and wrote the lyrics together. I was going through a messy breakup at the time and liked the idea of having more aggressive and emotional lyrics against such an upbeat production backdrop. This song is about not fully understanding how to let go of someone while also understanding that you can't and shouldn't have them in your life anymore. It's basically the best I could do at writing a "diss track"...I'm not very good at confrontation...or "diss tracks".

lyrics

I don't wanna love you
I don't wanna love you

If I could dream I had teeth like a tiger,
I'd make you scream drown you in the mud.
And on the news they'd call it friendly fire,
but we would know what it was all made of.

I don't wanna love you
I don't wanna love you

I wanna meet you in the jungle.
I wanna sink my teeth in deep.
I'm gonna track you like the hunter,
you better watch out where you sleep.

Can you see yourself in the mirror?
Or would it spit you out like a ghost?
Ya, she couldn't bare to paint you,
on top the background that you chose.

I don't wanna love you
I don't wanna love you
I don't wanna love you
I don't wanna love you

What if I told you, there was a power over everything I do?
I wouldn't want to make you believe that I ever needed you.
I don't wanna love you, I'm kicking and screaming
nobody hears the truth
I don't want to

Does it give you some satisfaction
or does it make you weak in your knees?
To know I'm loud enough to get a reaction,
but I won't call your friends for sympathy.

I've been crossing up all my fingers
and counting on all my toes,
that somehow I could just forget you.
Sometimes it's too hard too let go.

I don't need your loving,
I don't wanna love you
I don't wanna love you
I don't wanna love you

credits

released January 16, 2017

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Begonia Winnipeg, Manitoba

As Begonia, Alexa Dirks has blossomed into an indie pop powerhouse who feels like music’s best-kept secret to her fans.

New album Powder Blue is out Feb 24 on Birthday Cake Records.

Begonia has been nominated for a JUNO Award and longlisted for The Polaris Music Prize. Her music has been on numerous Netflix & Oprah Winfrey Network, and NPR named Begonia as one of 10 Artists You Need to Know.
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